Life, and I say this with honesty, has been real awesome lately. Lots of stories, lots of happy faces, sweet reunions, lots of msn conversations with people I havent seen for ages, lots of cupcakes and tarts, lots of sweet brownies to share, as well as some hearty discussions and flaring issues and tactful judgements and diplomacy and other grown up things like that. To update, here are some random lists of thoughts and happenings lately..


1. Went to the City of the Wind and I was instantly blown away by my own emotion at seeing 2 of my closest friends in NZ that I havent seen for ages. One night, we went out and rented dvds and climbed onto Diyana's bed and snuggled closer and pulled blanket around us - reminding me just how routine that sort of closeness used to be. One time, Diyana cooked her special sambal fish for us - again reminding me just how she used to cook that exact dish back when we were still living together in Dunedin. One time, we went out and walked around the city and Mizah wanted to buy a top - reminding me how we used to go shopping together back in those days when we saw each other everyday. Many times, we went to cafes and restaurants and trying out dishes and sharing morsels of food and sweet things like that - reminding me that we used to have little gatherings like that back in those days when food was our comfort when stress became too overwhelming.





We might not see each other and talk that frequently anymore, but things are definitely still sweet. =)


2. That week in Wellington also, I learn that unexpected kindness tastes sweeter than chocolate. I couldnt really express Nisa's and my gratitudes towards our hosts (Aisyah, Azri and Bas) for having us and went out of their ways to make our stay as comfortable as possible. Tolerating our late nights giggling and late hours sleep-ins, testing our general knowledge on travel trivia (which is sad to say that mine is minimal :/ ), feeding us with hot drinks and hot mee goreng, entertaining us with stories and skytv and internet access and everything else. I had fun and I attribute that much of the fun was coming from our lovely hosts. I am immensely grateful.




3. Had late night talks with a friend lately - concerning love and friendships and relationships and other confusing things like that. My take on this is - I dont know. I still dont know - all 22 years of my life, I am still as clueless when it comes to that four-letter-word and the best possible reply that I could muster is only "we'll see" - which I utter repeatedly like some sort of forsaken chants when actually I am really lost. Actually, if you know me well enough, when I say that phrase over and over again, it means that I dont know anything and I am just trying to convince myself that I do.




4. I tried on a dress at this shop in the city one time with Ann during our lunchbreak. I fell in love with it but didnt buy it. But I liked what I saw on the mirror because I saw a lady - not someone that I was so used to seeing wearing jeans and sneakers and black tees. I went home mulling over it and opened a bag loaded with presents from Diyana early this year - delighted seeing my new, untouched palette of colours and tubes of eyeliners. Sadly, all 22 years of my life, things like these are still alien to me but somehow, lately, hormones have kicked in and I just want to look at myself in the mirror and present myself more like a lady with heels and all.


5. I lost some of my silver rings that I had collected since my second year here. =.= Misplaced, fallen off, forgotten, whatever... the bottomline is, I have lost some of my most loved possessions. Among all other jewelleries, I love rings, especially big rings. One time when I went to class, a colleague saw my ring and took it from my finger and slid it on his little finger. He laughed and teased me on why I always wear many rings at one time - but he wore that particular one ring throughout our one hour written exam before returning it back to me. Hah. Silly or not, I still love it but somewhere between that class and my home that afternoon, it fell and that was my last memory of it. =.=




6. Before holiday started and during my peak stress periods, I went out a lot. Ann and I seemed to have similar tastes in clothings and we went on shopping sprees a lot as money seemed to grow on trees. During those periods, I plucked my money leaves almost everyday during our outings on comfort foods like coffees and cakes and other redundant items like new tops and pants and jeans, willing our stresses to go away with every purchase that we made. Now, during this holiday, I havent seen her at all and I wonder whether she has gotten herself that nice red top that she has wanted to buy.



7. I called home last night and talked mostly to my mom. Exchanging news and the latest happenings over there since I havent called home for more than a month. Somehow, this year I call home even less and less often and I blame it on my busy schedule. But if I am to be honest to myself, that is not the entire reason why I avoid picking up that phone. Sometimes, not knowing anything is bliss. And my inquisitive nature more often that not only cause me to demand answers that only flare up my temper, leaving me with a full-on ranting mode. Frustrations, anger, resentment - I dont think I have forgiven yet even though that cloud has been hanging for months. Ah.. pretending not to know can be a bliss sometimes.




8. My first cousin is getting married in less than a month's time - and I have only known this a few days ago. Not that I really care actually. We rarely see each other and so, we are not exactly the best-of-friends who constantly update each other with the latest happenings in each other's life - although this news definitely took me by surprise and I choked on my cup of coffee upon hearing it. Nonetheless, congratulations and may happiness be dawned upon you and your husband, my dear Melati. That's her name, Melati. I like her name - like floral of some sort.. pretty soon, she is going to be picked from my aunt's garden and I hope this man is going to give her everlasting beautiful sunshines.


9. I have 2 more weeks of holidays before starting on my new run. Time to kickback and relax a little as well as to get started doing my 3 assignments and revising for my biochem exam. When I glanced at my noticeboard I notice just how little time is left for me to accomplish anything and yet I still couldnt bring myself to start on anything yet.. M still miss procrastination who enjoys long breaks - however, I couldnt keep away this gnawing feeling that I do need to visit my patient soon.. The last time I visited her I have told her that I will see her again this week and she wrote down my name in her calendar dates so she wouldnt forget. Hrm.. :S



10. I have a meeting of some sort this tuesday afternoon. We'll see about that, we'll see. =.=