I have one busy week - my first week in General Medicine. I am in GM2 and so far, I love everyone in my team. My reg has always made it a point to harass me with endless questions, asking me to interpret ECG results and setting me little tasks to do around the ward. Which is great - because theres nothing like being quizzed and pressured that drives one to study.

We were on-call last tuesday. And despite the long day, it had been awesome. I saw quite a number of patients and it had really felt like a very productive day for me, a 4th year student. Haha. I still got excited after clerking in patients and working through my differentials and discussing the management plans for each patient I saw with my reg, I still got excited after I took blood specimen, I still got excited over listening and trying to differentiate whether the patient has normal sounds on auscultation, I still got excited over small things, even things as small as filling in forms to send in to the radiology. I guess it just shows that now I am only in the beginning of my clinical experience and everything around me is still exciting. I am writing this down just in case one day all these excitement wears off and I want to re-read this paragraph over and over again so that I could relive this (?childish) excitement again.

Just like how I re-read my diary last night trying to relive those moments when I used to be excited for raya or overwhelmed by sadness when I couldnt be back in Brunei. I re-read my handwritten scrawls across my fat diary's pages, trying to recall just how I used to be swarmed in raya spirits, even though I was away from home. I must have exhausted my raya spirits somewhere because now, I couldnt even muster to even think about it. Raya this year, feels just like any other day - I went to my tutorial as usual, attended my clinics, went to my post-acute ward round and did the usual things I usually did. And for the first time since I am abroad, the fact that I am away from home during this supposedly festive season no longer bothers me. I am perfectly content.